I SEE YOU Big Brother…
The Hamburger Way: An Outline to How Manipulators Think
Every move has a purpose.
Full blown mind tricks, traps, emotional flattery and charm are some of what constitute the toolbox of an average psychological manipulator. Rest assured, the exception of culture and the endless combination of strategies to achieve self-serving purposes can become more simple to identify.
The Top Bun/Bread: Creating Positive Impressions & Social Masks
Purpose: To create a positive persona or impression enough to carry them through their plans and masquerade the lies. When a mask is no useful (or when it is destroyed), they switch to or create a new one.
Strategy & reason: Social masks and personas make it more difficult to identify a manipulator’s truths, lies, or personal history. Because there is a conscious attempt to erase the origins of how the individual came to be and their true intentions, other people are unable to bring them down due to lack of solid evidence for comparison.
These social personas can extend to cover every aspect of their life including friendships, lovers, coworkers, etc. in order to maintain a degree of unpredictability for unsuspecting victims or to protect themselves from others who try to expose them.
The Cheese/Vegan Cheese: Solidifying Desired Patterns In People Help the Manipulator Reach their Goals
Purpose: Create lasting patterns that support the manipulator for as long as he/she/they want. These patterns are usually thoroughly planned to be executed on victims. Additionally, a manipulator will attempt to degrade their victims emotionally in order to achieve this pattern; emotionally vulnerable individuals are the ideal victims.
Strategy & reason: While the types of patterns vary, each method will contain at least one tactic is specifically designed to degrade the emotional integrity of a person. For example, if a victim blames themselves or becomes desperate when a person ghosts them, a manipulator may ghost them on purpose, fabricating reasons on why they should do X or, if they don’t do Y, the manipulator will continue to ghost them or threaten them by spending time with someone else.
Another example would be if a victim craved affection. A manipulator would twist the wants of the victim to suit themselves [manipulator] — so that on the surface, it looks like the victim gets affection after doing XYZ (when it’s not sincere affection); such as being given empty compliments or sweet talk instead of genuine encouragement, hugs, quality time with significant other, etc.
As long as the victim is unaware, a manipulator will continue their efforts until the victim becomes a hollow shell of themselves; where the victim follows whatever the manipulator wants without question. By establishing this mindset into the victim, the manipulator does not need to invest as much energy or effort to maintain the effect.
This method also helps the manipulator to find and invest in more victims in order to advance in their plans, create more backups, etc.
The Meat/Vegan Patty: Creating Opportunities that Result in Zero Consequences and Endless Benefits
Purpose: To milk benefits from victims to suit the manipulator’s desires or wants. May include a mixture of emotional punishment or conditioned fear/anxiety to make these opportunities into reality. Requires charisma.
Strategies & reason: On par with creating masks and personas, a manipulator may agree to favors eagerly or ask for them. Based on how far their charisma takes them (and how well they maintain it), this will allow a manipulator to get closer on securing a sturdy reputation to continue borrowing, or, in the case of helping someone, ensure that the victim will at least owe them something.
When someone owes the manipulator, they may threaten to make the victim’s fears come true — to pressure them into giving what the manipulator wants. The more someone owes the manipulator, the better.
The Tomato: Creating Backups, Buffers, and Escape Routes
Purpose: To allow the time or space to change to a different mask or persona when needed. Alternative strategies to create this window of opportunity include stepping on people’s toes, having a tantrum, causing drama, spreading rumors, etc. Will do whatever it takes.
Strategy & reason: A manipulator acts to get the victim to feel something for them (whether positively or negatively) while choosing to not to develop feelings towards people. By taking advantage of the victims’ reactions, a manipulator twists stories to create distractions or threats for others to focus on. In doing so, the victim is more likely to switch their focus from the manipulator to managing the backlash created— allowing the manipulator to escape and reinforce better plans.
The Lettuce: Gathering followers, friends, allies, or people of high authority to reinforce their plans when the target retaliates or threatens them
Purpose: To build credibility, create groups where members have each others’ backs, etc. so that people will think twice when targeting or attacking them.
Strategy & reason: These network of people can become extremely complicated. For instance, a manipulator may choose to befriend the victim’s friends to use against them (if the victim’s friends are easily persuaded).
With individuals of higher authority, these people serve to block the victim from taking action that the manipulator doesn’t want by defending the manipulator or creating doubt in the victim (so that the victim thinks that they are the ones at fault). Makes it harder to expose them.
The Bottom Bun/Bread: Garnering Support from Outsiders with a Purpose or Vision (The Bait)
Purpose: To present a savory speech or promise to gain support from others to boast their credibility, create all-around protection (from those who believe in them), and to make it easier to threaten authorities opposing them to extract what reaction they want from them (ganging up on them).
Strategy & reason: By using like-minded groups, manipulators have a reduced chance to be directly attacked or exposed due to their followers defending their views. This allows the manipulator to continue their plans or to apply pressure onto the individual or groups targeted. For the majority of the time, the pressure applied discourages individuals or groups from wanting to expose them for the threat/fear of their social reputation being tarnished.
In sum, the followers serve as the manipulator’s force to spread rumors, misinformation, hatred, etc. (anything that the manipulator wants them to be) while making it seem as if they are keeping true to their vision.
Conclusion:
Often times, the patterns exhibited by manipulators will vary in different forms — usually with an eye for a long-term plan; every move has a purpose.
Excluding the amateurs, advanced manipulators are future-oriented despite the priorities they may seem to abide by.
